When you put your excuses on hold the other side is joy.
In school and then college I was always on the stage participating in elocutions and debates.
I loved the stage and the audience in front of me.
When I would be on stage I would be in a zone.
I loved to communicate ideas , enrol and inspire audiences.
I could get those around me find their expression and express more fully.
But then life happened. I put myself on hold.
There were more important things to do.
“I will do it some other day in the future” I said “when the kids are grown up , when I have enough money in the bank , when I am well settled.”
I kept postponing my dreams to the future.
Then I turned 50 and it occurred to me I have finite time.
One day I made a bucket list and I jumped head on.
I wanted to sing , I went ahead and recorded my first song in a studio. It’s there on YouTube.
My first song recorded in studio
I bought myself a professional home studio equipment , now I sing whenever I feel like.
I wanted to cycle . I was warned it is risky and this is not my age .
I went ahead and bought a cycle , I invested in the best I could.
I am now a cyclist, I cycle every day , weekends is for long distance.
When I cycle , it’s just me and the wind on my face , I can feel the freedom.
I wanted to see the stars I went ahead and bought a professional telescope.
That experience of watching the planets was surreal.
Felt the vastness and being one with existence , limitless.
I wanted to write a fiction story book . I did that and self published it . It’s on Amazon .
I got my first royalty check , felt good.
I wanted to teach non profits the art of fundraising with storytelling.
I travelled to five cities and over 500 non profits in India attended my workshops !
I always wanted to start my business.
I kept postponing afraid of the unknown.
I finally jumped in at 55 !
It is profitable and growing.
But more importantly I am doing what I always loved to do , helping individuals , businesses and causes express themselves fully . Live their potential.
I wanted to tell stories of good through films . I had no experience, no team and zero budgets.
One fine day I just decided I will do it . And that too during peak lockdown !
In a few months we have made over 10 short documentary films .
Launched the YouTube channel’Heroes of India’.
We now release two films a month.
I wanted to camp next to a waterfall overnight in heavy rains.
Camping next to a waterfall
I did that , the sound of the water splashing against the rocks and tapping of raindrops was out of the world experience.
From a typical corporate formal life , no fun wardrobe and look , I decided to just be myself.
A small step but one more step in the direction of freedom.
I love being myself
When I stopped my excuses , I truly found my joy.
Have to do it for pay check was an excuse.
Have responsibilities was an excuse.
What will others think was an excuse.
I cannot do it was an excuse.
I am not capable was an excuse.
I will do it sometime in the future was an excuse.
Excuses kept me safe in my comfort zones.
We have reasons , many excuses, why we postpone life.
We make up by trying to live on the weekends.
We trade our joy with a cage.
Sometimes the cage is golden. Yet is after all a cage.
When I look deeply there was no cage , it is all our own creation.
Now I have stopped all excuses , I have started living every day , every moment.
I have no regrets as every step of the journey has been a learning experience.
I refuse to die with my song in my heart.
P.S – Passion project is a message, life is finite , don’t die with your song in your heart